Twatwaffles Of The Week

And away we go.........................

Number Five:  Television's Dr. Mehmet Oz who has gotten flak from the FDA for getting his fans ginned up about allegedly dangerous levels of arsenic in many brands of apple juice while totally ignoring FDA tests that say just the opposite.  One of Oz's medical school classmate called the report "irresponsible". 

Apple Juice Or Arsenic Juice?

Isn't this a microcosm of what is wrong with this country, folks?  Let's just throw something out there, and damn the facts.  I mean no disrespect here, but Dr. Oz's fans don't strike me as the type to follow the news, so they will probably be convinced that their apple juice could be deadly.  Maybe Dr. Oz needs a lesson in laws regarding slander.

Number Four:  We have a tie for number four this week, dear readers.  Robert Young, 43, and Mark Rubinson, 25, of Denver, CO, who are accused of loading the body of a deceased friend into a car and going bar hopping with it.  Jeffrey Jarrett died last month at 43. The cause of Jarrett’s death is still being investigated.  After taking Jarrett to two bars, Young and Rubinson then withdrew $400 from Jarrett's bank account.  Rubinson and Young face charges of abusing a corpse, identity theft and criminal impersonation. A relative said Young was living with Jarrett and came home on Aug. 27 to find him dead, but didn’t call for help.

Let's Take Our Dead Buddy Out Drinking................

Okay, this is wrong on so many levels.  First, why the hell was the body still in these guys' house?  Second, why, of the date of death was known, was the body not removed by the coroner?  Third, what kind of sickos put a three week old corpse in a vehicle and drive about town with it??????

Number Three:  Again, we have a tie....................  Unidentified 14 and 16 year old Osborn, MI students who assaulted a teacher in his own classroom.  Reports dictate this started as a bit of prank (if we can call it that) when the teacher was hit in the back with a stapler.  After which, these two fine examples of American youth hid in a closet and then pummeled the teacher when he opened the closet door.

I'm Bored. Let's Chuck A Stapler At The Teacher And Beat The Tar Out Of Him When He Finds Us

I remember when our idea of messing with a teacher was hiding all the erasers or chalk.  We certainly never threw anything at them, and I shudder to think what would have happened to me should I ever have laid a hand on an educator.  The kicker about this is that the 16 year old was on probation for carrying a gun.  Unbelievable!!!!!!!!!!

Number Two:  Jason Brensen, an assistant coach with the Morrisville (PA) high school football team, who is said to have offered a $100 bounty to any of his players who would knock the star running back from the opposing team out duing Morrisville's 29-6 loss last Saturday.  Of course, contrary to eye witness accounts, Brensen claims he merely said that if his defense continued to work hard against the opposing rusher, they would wear him down.  Brensen resigned rather than face suspension.

You Can't Put A Bounty On A Kid's Head!!!!! I Just Did........

This is yet another fine example of sportsmanship at its best, isn't it?  I realize at the high school level it is about winning, but a bounty on another kid?  What would have happened if one of Morrisville's defenders would have taken the coach seriously and injured the opposing player?  This is just unconscionable!!!!!!

Number One:  Speaking of unconscionable, meet our number one twatwaffle for the week, Kimberly Fry, 38, of North Kingstown, RI, who is on trial for allegedly strangling her eight year old daughter to death tow years ago.  The dead girl's offense?  She wouldn't take a bath.  The girl's father found her lifeless body in her bed the next morning.

Mom Strangles Daughter Over Bath Refusal

Wow.  An eight year old who didn't want to bathe?  Shocking.  That is what eight year olds do.  Again, folks, I don't make this stuff up.  I just report it.  I do find Ms. Fry's last name to be appropriate since she, I would think, deserves to fry.

Peace and love, my brothers and sisters.