Twatwaffles Of The Week

And away we go...................................
Number Five:  The Justices of the Indiana Supreme Court, who recently ruled that a person riding in a car with a designated driver can still be charged with public intoxication.

Got A Designated Driver? You're Still Going To Jail For PI!!

I understand that Indiana's public intoxication laws are flawed beyond belief, but would this not have been a good time to modify the law from the bench?  Of course, this is the same court that ruled the police can invade innocent Hoosiers' homes without a warrant or any type of probable cause or good reason, so why should I be surprised?  Doesn't this fly in the face of the spirit of using a designated driver?  There you are, dear reader, minding your own business, not being disruptive, being driven home by a sober friend after a night of partaking in adult beverages.  Your designated driver is pulled over for a minor traffic infraction, and off you go to jail!!!!!!!  Only in Indiana.

Number Four:  Stephanie Robinette, 30, of Delaware, OH, who recently pleaded guilty to spraying sheriff's deputies with breast milk.

Keep Back Or I'll Shoot......................My Breast Milk!!!!!!!

According to media reports, the young "lady" literally pumped her breasts in order to squirt milk at law enforcement officers who had arrived to intervene in a domestic violence situation between her and her husband.  Really, folks, can you think of anything more undignified and repugnant; and for a new mother no less?  On top of this, she is a teacher!!!  Way to set an example for your child and your students...............

A Dicknozzle Of Douchebaggery goes to her attorney who must be oblivious to the the fact that blood borne diseases such as HIV can be transmitted through breast milk.

Number Three:  John McClure, the owner of a Clearwater, FL Skyline Chili who took it upon himself to place a sign on his restaurant's door informing the jurors in the Casey Anthony case that they are not welcome in his store.

What? You Did Your Civic Duty And Did It Well? Stay The Hell Out Of My Chili Shack!!!!

Okay, I guess this bonehead can have whatever opinion on the Anthony case that he wants.  Lord knows, he isn't the only one making an ass out of himself over it, but......................  What the bloody hell is he going to do?  Ask all of the patrons as they enter his establishment?  As if any of them would be damn fool enough to admit their membership on said jury.  Also, isn't the idea of owning a restaurant to sell as much food and drink as possible?  Why would he knowingly tell twelve people with greenbacks in their pockets to keep them in their pockets. 

A second Dicknozzle Of Douchebaggery goes to the hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of Americans who seem to be totally clueless as to how the judicial system in this country functions (and functions well for the most part).  Ladies and Gentlemen, what you THINK matters not.  What matters is that the prosecutors in this case did not meet their burden of proof.  Hence, the defendant, Ms. Anthony, deplorable as she may be, is acquitted of the charges against her.  Period.  End of story.

Number Two:  Rich Swier, an activist with the Tea Party Nation who recently stated that anti-gay bullying is not bullying at all; but is, in fact, “peer pressure and is healthy.”

Anti-Gay Bullying Isn't Really Bullying....................

Swier was responding to a report from a Florida group that showed that “77% of all bullying victims are picked on due to sexual orientation, gender identity, or the perception of either.” The report also pointed out that “LGBT youth are up to five times more likely to commit suicide than their straight counterparts.”, but according to Swier, the anti-bullying campaign is nothing more than a sham by “radical gay activists.” He says that it’s all a part of the ever omnipotent “gay agenda” and its plan to indoctrinate school children into the so-called “homosexual lifestyle.” 

Friends and frenemies, I don't even know where to start?  It is "radical" to point out that sexual orientation is a reason for a majority of bullying?  It is healthy for an individual to be bullied?  Constant torment at the hands of other children is merely peer pressure?  And what exactly is this "gay agenda" we keep hearing about from the right?  I guess demanding equality under the law is a "radical agenda".  Sodding ridiculous.  These people won't be satisfied until they drag us back into the Stone Age.

Number One:  Kelli Murphy, 41, of Castle Rock, CO, who after a 911 call regarding a suicide attempt told the 911 dispatcher that the kids in her home had "already gone to heaven".

Maybe She Should Have Killed Herself Instead Of Her Kids...

Why were the children on their way to the afterlife?  Because their "mother" allegedly smothered them both to death.  Yet another example of Parent Of The Year, eh, folks?  Somehow, I don't think Ms. Murphy's final destination will be paradise.  Again, dear readers, I don't make this stuff up.

Peace and love, my brothers and sisters.